In the spirit of philosophy light-bulb jokes,
each semester I tell my students a few light-bulb jokes and ask them to
come up with a few of their own. Here are a few examples:

(1) How many philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?

Three; one to change the light-bulb and two to debate whether they ought to, and if so, whether it follows that they can.

(2) How many ancient philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?

Four; one to change the light-bulb and three to say "Yes, Socrates," "Well done, Socrates," "Good job, Socrates."

(3) How many medieval philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?

Two; one to change the light-bulb and one to check what Aristotle said about changing light-bulbs.

Feel free to add your own jokes in the comments.

I wish everyone a very successful semester.

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16 responses to “How many philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?”

  1. Q: How many Pyrrhonian skeptics does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: …

  2. I feel like there are probably some good jokes about the number of solipsists required to change a light bulb, but I don’t think anyone else would find them funny.

  3. (4) How many Rawlsians does it take to change a light-bulb?
    Answer: none. Rawls never said to change light-bulbs.
    (5) How many Marxists does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Answer: none. They rip out light-sockets to overthrow the oppressive forces of electricity. Alas, they end up shrouded in darkness.
    (6) How many mind-body dualists does it take to change a light-bulb?
    Answer: 1/2. Their minds are elsewhere.

  4. (7) How many environmental ethicists does it take to change a light-bulb?
    Answer: none. Any supply of working light bulbs should be stored for future generations to use.

  5. Douglas Section

    Ramsey asked Wittgenstein… He said, Don’t foot the ladder!

  6. Q: How many Eleatic Philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?
    A: Change?!

  7. Brad

    How many Wittgensteinians does it take to change a light bulb?
    Depends if it’s early or late.

  8. Brad

    Not exactly philosophy, but related. I came up with this one some years ago.
    How many absurdist playwrights does it take to change a light bulb?
    Green.

  9. Yeah just keep your light bulbs for future use he got a point.

  10. Q: When was the light bulb invented?
    A: In the Enlightenment.
    Poor I know but it’s quite a difficult ask. I was thinking about the Allegory of the Cave and switching on the light but couldn’t get it into a good punchline.

  11. Q: How many Heideggerians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: One. But after the act he is overwhelmed by an agrarian nostalgia and regrets his enframing of electricity.

  12. andy

    How many philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?
    A: It doesn’t matter: they don’t know what that means!

  13. Pieter Moree

    How many philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?
    Infinitely many. The first starts to discuss what it means for a light-bulb to exist, the second is wondering about the nature of light, the third argues that light is something taking place in your head, etc. etc.

  14. James Reed

    How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb?
    It’s a purely hypothetical situation so nobody really knows

  15. MMOJ

    How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Depends on how many don’t get hung up on dissecting this question ad infinitum and just enjoy the experience instead.

  16. Charlie



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